2004-2005 Winning Entries

  • September 2004

    9/13 - 9/17  "As rough as a carpenter's hands on a cold winter's night."

    9/20 - 9/24  "As crazy as the mall before Christmas."

    9/27 - 10/1  "As surprising as a Friday with no homework."

    October 2004

    10/4 - 10/8   "As annoying as the next door neighbor trying to play guitar for the first time."

    10/12 - 10/15  "As far-fetched as Edgar Allen Poe writing a children's book."

    10/18 - 10/22  "As wild as the school's hallways on the last day of school."

    10/25 - 10/29  "As peculiar as Beethoven in a death metal band."

    November 2004

    11/1 - 11/5  "As strict as Mr. Kanick when his students get up at the bell."

    11/8 - 11/12  "As fun as watching Joe dance to Usher."

    11/15 - 11/19  "As embarrassing as your mom bringing out naked baby pictures of you when your new girlfriend is over."

    11/29 - 12/3  "As loud as me screaming when a llama spat in my face for fighting with its baby at the petting zoo."

    December 2004

    12/6 - 12/10  "As excited as going down the Superman when your seatbelt comes undone."

    12/13 - 12/17  "As shocking as grandma getting run over by a reindeer."

    12/20 - 12/23   "As amusing as Mr. Kanick when he says 'smooth like budduh.'"

    January 2005

    1/3 - 1/7  "As likable as Mrs. Clark's son when he speaks to the class."

    1/10 - 1/14  "As sweet as jumping into a pool with your clothes on during a thunderstorm in the pouring rain."

    1/18 - 1/21  "As impossible as Mr. Kanick not insulting his students during class."

    1/24 - 1/28  "As challenging as helping put up walls, make a sandwich for my uncle, try to get Kara to stop standing there and do something, catch my two-year-old brother who is running around the house yelling 'ha-ha, ha-ha,' open the door for my mother who just got home from the store, write this simile, and watch Seventh Heaven all at the same time."

    1/31 - 2/4  "As unexpected as Mr. Kanick and the word interesting ending up in the same sentence."

    February 2005

    2/7 - 2/11  "As useless as an inflatable dart board."

    2/14 - 2/18  "As lucky as finding a blank check from Bill Gates not addressed to anyone."

    2/28 - 3/4  "As compelling as sitting in the high school auditorium for seven hours."

    March 2005

    3/7 - 3/11  "As lazy as leaving a question blank on a true/false test."

    3/14 - 3/18  "As deadly as putting your head in the ball return to see if your bowling ball is coming."

    3/21 - 3/24  "As stinky as a French girl's armpits."

    April 2005

    4/4 - 4/8  "As uncontrollable as Chris throwing a baseball."

    4/11 - 4/15  "As determined as Turkey trying to come up with a comeback on Mr. Kanick."

    4/18 - 4/22  "As beautiful as the homework board saying NONE for every subject."

    4/25 - 4/29  "As superb as Green Day putting on a concert in the school auditorium."

    May 2005

    5/2 - 5/6  "As heroic as the person who bought Mr. Kanick's old car."

    5/9 - 5/13  "As gnarly as the first day of summer vacation."

    5/16 - 5/20  "As ornery as a kid is when he is at the amusement park and he can't go on the only ride he wants to because he is too small."

    5/23 - 5/27  "As urgent as Mr. Kanick getting to the lunchroom when there is turkey slop!"

    June 2005

    5/31 - 6/3  "As athletic as Mr. Benker's guns."