2006-2007 Winning Entries

  • September 2006

    9/11- 9/15 
    "As rough as eating toast with a sore throat and nothing to drink."

    9/18- 9/22  "To eat like a sumo wrestler trying to move up a weight class."

    9/25 - 9/29  "As crazy as wearing a Red Sox hat to Yankee Stadium."

    October 2006

    10/2 - 10/6   "To speak like a dentist's patient after being injected with novocaine."

    10/9 - 10/13  "As far-fetched as Mr. Kanick serving in the Canadian military."

    10/23 - 10/27  "To exaggerate like the weather people did about our 'little snowfall.'"

    10-30 - 11/3  "As secretive as the real ingredients out school puts into turkey slop."

    November 2006

    11/6 - 11/9  "To think like a monkey trying to open a banana for the first time."

    11/13 - 11/17  "As surprising as Mr. Kanick suffocating his own piggies."

    11/27 - 12/1  "To compete like Mr. Kanick to be the first person in the lunch line on the day they serve turkey slop."

    December 2006

    12/4 - 12/8  "As annoying as someone singing a song you just got out of your head."

    12/11 - 12/15  "To prepare like the bus is coming around the corner and you're just crawling out of bed."

    12/18 - 12/22  "As urgent as kids are on Christmas Day, waking up at 3:00 a.m. to open present." 

    January 2007

    1/2 - 1/5 "To smile like seeing your dad for the first time after three years of fighting the war in Iraq."

    1/8 - 1/12 "As strict as a general on the first day of boot camp."

    1/16 - 1/19 "To brag like Mrs. Aguglia when she finds proof, for Mr. Kanick, that she has friends."

    1/22 - 1/26 "As loud as Mr. Kirby when he laughs at his own joke that nobody gets."

    1/29 - 2/2 "To run like Mr. Kanick from a turkey out for revenge."

    February 2007

    2/5 - 2/9  "As shocking as the temperature turning to 80 degrees during the winter in Buffalo." 

    2/26 - 3/2  "To sleep like you ate a whole turkey on Thanksgiving."

    March 2007

    3/5 - 3/9  "As important as writing your name on your underwear when you go to camp."

    3/12 - 3/16  "To laugh like Mr. Kirby at his Korny Kirby jokes."

    3/19 - 3/23   "As sweet as not having to hear Mrs. Aguglia and Mr. Kanick bicker anymore."

    3/26 - 3/30  "To act like Jonas when he saw the tape of the real release."

    April 2007

    4/2 - 4/5   "As defiant as a little kid climbing on the counter and the fridge to get the cookie jar before mommy sees him."

    4/16 - 4/20  "To dance like a barefoot little kid on blacktop during the summer."

    4/23 - 4/27  "As lazy as the people who don't even bother to enter the Great American Simile Contest."

    4/30 - 5/4  "To cheer like the entire city of Buffalo when the Sabres win the Stanley Cup."

    May 2007

    5/7 - 5/11  "As useless as turkey slop on a snow day."

    5/14 - 5/18  "To celebrate like all of team 7B when it has just been announced that there will be a turkey slop party."

    5/21 - 5/25  "As unexpected as the Kool-Aid man busting through your wall and screaming, 'Oh, yeah!'"

    5/29 - 6/1  "To trick like someone who steals Mr. Kanick's lunch calendar and tells him that the school is having turkey slop when it's really a half day."